Lunatic Fringe

To go to Tom Petty, unless you went. The show was fantastic, the girl passing out on my legs however, was not. About 95% of Ilion goes to Tom Petty shows, according to my exhaustive census research. Woody/Jenn, Chad/Ho, Sven/Smash, Boner, Peter, Monie/Stacy, B Wallace, Nikki D and that Sam girl were all in our pre-concert platoon. And all of them took turns asking me why I had a long sleeved shirt on, so the communal spirit was alive and well. Much drinking was done, some folks even played a little beer pong, I met a guy named Pete who looked nothing like the Pete I knew. The Pete I know kind of looked like what Ray Charles would have looked like if he were white, so I gave him some glasses, ask him about it when you get a chance, it's funny. When you go to a concert like that one can't help but be extremely grateful for being single, hot chicks dig Tom Petty, big time. But when you watch the show, you kinda want to have a girl, so you can lean on them when your legs get tired,

This off-season I was pretty stoked for the Mets signing of free-agent outeilder Carlos Beltran, even though i knew his numbers would slip a lil playing in Shea. Never in life would I have expected the type of player we got. His sub-par numbers (.268 BA 12HR 53RBI) are mediocre at best, and for player a people were expecting a 40/40 season from, he has 5 stolen bases this year. Watching him at the plate is the biggest joke of my life. It's to the point now I long for the days of a Jay Payton, or a Daryl Hamilton, or even a Butch Husky, please. The main reason Beltran loses me so much though is his utter dis-respect for hustle. Not running out fly balls or grounders, lack of concentration in the feild, are just parts of the reasons i wish the signing never took place. To think Victor Diaz is wasting away in the minors, trying to learn to play 1ST, for what, an overpayed bum to watch his pop-ups get dropped. All the trade talks about sending away Cameran, maybe we could send away Car

Top 5 things from the past week: 1 Wallace on the hood of that broads car as she drove fast, he screaming. You put the mental picture together. 2 Timmy beating the shat out of the door to his home, Wallace trying to calm him down; only to have large objects thrown at him. 3 Wallace throwing a chair at Jay Bird. 4 Joe B crying in front of my computer at 5 in the morning about a truck that looks like his old one; "you never forget your first truck card" 5 Going to hell, and realizing they are calling it Skate-o-rama these days, it's on Whitesboro street, check it out. Wallace, he's Satan, he likes the place, what are you gonna do? Petty concert is coming up pretty soon, kinda want to go, who else is going? I need a show of hands people (put your hand down you dumb ass). Matt Reina makes excellent pulled pork, it is now a fact of life that you must deal with when you are hungry. If you like middle fingers, check out Gia Vallone's photo albums, she has lots of them i

Calling a chick a punt -p +c is a bad idea, doing it a second time in the same night will not cancel out the first one, it accrues. Dumb people should be placed upside-down in a large crate and shipped to a different hemisphere than whatever one I may choose to be in. If they manage to walk home after they are dropped off, maybe I was right, they're not dumb, just mutants. So far this summer, if you were keeping score on Gia falling, this is what you'd have in terms of observation points: Me: 2, The rest of the world: 0. How does that happen? Craig Wright can deliver the hell out of a pizza (or can he)? The mets aren't as bad as everybody says they are, they're worse. Bob Saget: most underrated actor of this or any generation, there will be no debate on this subject. With the addition of this year's draft class, I now know 7 players in the NBA. When the hell did Bill Cartwright and Kenny "Sky" Walker retire? Those young fellas could sure play. Red heads,

So it's been a week since last weekend, one of those things right? But I'm still alive, and no longer any the worse for wear. I had a scrumtrelescant time at Marla's reception (congrats kids). There were many Ptarkness running around, and even more jack and cokes; so I had it all. The Demmas were excellent hosts, at one point we even almost got to beat some guy up, I was pulling like heck for that to happen, but hey I always root for the underdog- mainly for the underdog to do something stupid enough to get beat up for. I slapped a lot of asses, (I wonder if a theme has officially developed yet on that front) mingled a little bit, and told a bunch of stories that may or may not have made any sense at all. Ask around, I'm sure there are pictures out there to prove it...but the real moral of the story is, when you go to a reception, you should really look into staying as long as you can drinking hard liquor, and then getting a ride home long after you've forgotten wha